New Year Plan

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I know, I know, everyone this time of year says, "Set your goals for 2009 - ya da ya da" well I am here to say, "set some goals for 2009!" ha!


Seriously though, I am a firm believer in making a plan and then working the plan. So here is my two cents:


1) Take a few hours between now and January 1st to THINK about what you would like to see happen in 2009 in regards to the main areas of your life; Marriage, Children, Health, Career, Friends, School, Family, Destiny, and the most important GOD.


2) WRITE out what you want in each area.


3) Make a simple PLAN to accomplish the "wants" - with easy steps.


4) SHARE with friend for help and accountability.


5) LOOK at it regulary to stay on course.


6) Work it baby!


Example: Let's say your Goal/Desire is to have a closer relationship with Christ. WRITE that down, then add what that may look like for you ... then the PLAN would be to attend Mercy Church every Sunday that you are in town, join a life group or volunteer on a Sunday service team, read the Bible every day, pray every day, pick up a good devotional, or Bible study book to read. Tell a friend about this (obviously someone with the same goal so they will encourage you not discourage you. Make sure to LOOK at the goal to keep it fresh in your heart!


I am firmly convinced that to have a healthy balanced Christian life you MUST be a part of a local church community!


Happy New Year! May it be your best one ever!

Depression pt 2

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Many times (most the time) we live our life according to our feelings; if we “feel” mad, we act mad, if we feel “hated” we act hated, if we feel “loved” we act loved, if we feel “successful” we act successful, if we feel like a failure” we act like a failure, if we feel “happy” we act happy … etc. You get the point. So we typically just go with our feelings … “feelings” dictate how we feel (of course) and how we act … in other words - we are what we feel.

I have learned an interesting thing not only from personal experience, but from many other resources through the years … and that is this; “Feelings follow action”.

The one Guru on this teaching that I am familiar with is Tony Robbins. Now, before you roll your eyes and think, “here goes some mumbo jumbo self-help stuff” he is just one of many people who teach this principle, but I like him because he is a Christian and not some New Age-ish weirdo spiritualist type dude who says to “draw from deep within your spirit self and ignite the inner you to connect to the spirit of the love god who floats around playing the harp… ya day a da”.

I’ve read and listened to most all Tony’s stuff and frankly it’s been a real blessing to me and my emotional life. Now I of course filter this through the lens of scripture for balance.

So here is my recommendation if you or someone you know is facing Depression:

1) Attend Church every Sunday!
2) Connect with others!
3) Read the Bible every single day!
4) Pray everyday!
5) *Get and go through some Tony Robbins books and CD’s.

*No I was not paid by Tony Robbins to say any of this … though he should throw something my way for as many people I have turned on to his books!

And finally can I just say, obviously I believe that GOD is the answer … but can we just be honest here? It’s takes more than just being a Christian to be healthy emotionally and spiritually and physically! I know and have known MANY Depressed Christians!

Depression pt 1

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I am not sure if I have ever blogged on the subject of depression, but it is a very real emotional state that many people face. I am not sure if you’ve ever heard it said that “suicide increases over the holidays” but that is actually not true! The opposite is actually true … “Suicide rates DECREASE over the holidays”. Why?

  • People gathering together with friends and family.
  • Christmas celebrations evoke a sense of hopefulness and a renewed outlook on life.
  • Community awareness of reaching out and loving and caring for hurting people.


I’ve personally never been “depressed”, but I have been tempted to allow feelings of depression to creep in and take over my life… I think most everyone has faced “opportunities” to be depressed.

I have not read anything recently on depression so what I am going to say next is just from my gut … so I hope it can help you (if you are facing feelings of depression) or equip you to help someone you may know facing depression.

I realize there is medical and chemical side to depression that I am not knowledgeable of … though can I say that “food” is a chemical, so I would encourage anyone facing depression to eat healthy. (Like cut out all sugar, junk food and fast food … drink water only and eat lots of veggies!)

I do want to address depression from a spiritual perspective; depression is a feeling, or various feelings of (i.e. loneliness, failure, sadness, pessimism, hopelessness, worthlessness, loss, pain, etc.) and when we give into those feelings (allow them to dictate to us what we will and will not do) we further perpetuate the “feelings” of depression.

This is why I’ve encouraged those who are depressed to get out and do the things they WANT to do but the depression won’t let them do. Many times when someone is depressed they engage in activities that only feed their emotional state of depression, when what they should do is what would feed a positive mental state.

For example when someone is depressed they remove themselves from friends and family, they sleep a lot, watch TV a lot (that in itself is depressing to me!) they don’t get out, and sometimes they don’t clean themselves up … wearing sloppy clothes, and not wearing makeup, etc. Again, these are all things that further FEED the mental state that they want to beat.


*please understand that my heart goes out to those who are facing depression ... I have family members who are facing depression issues ... so I pray you, or those you know facing depression find the answers to make them alive again! I of course believe the answer is found in Christ ... a long with practical (and sometimes medical) things as well.

Feelings follow action … more on that in Depression pt 2

Online Dating

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Jana and I married just after Al Gore created the internet. (Cough, cough …ha ha) So there was no internet dating options available when we were dating, so how we met was the old fashion way (I scratched my name and number in a few women’s bathroom walls at places like Crown Center and Jana called - Lol!)

We didn’t even have a computer until after we were married for a year. Wow, I feel old! (We married in June of 1994).

I do believe that changing times calls for changes in the way we do things … and internet dating is definitely a valuable tool in meeting people and here are some guiding principles you would do well to follow.

I obviously do not have any experience with internet dating, but I do understand people, how relationships work, and love, so I have some insight that should be helpful for those who are in the internet “dating” scene and want to find true love.

1) Find the right site – No all sites are created equal. I have no idea which ones are good, but do your research! Also find one that fits who you are looking for … meaning; if you are a healthy-eating vegetarian, then find an “online dating service” for vegetarians (yes, there are sites that are that specific). There is a site for single farmers looking to meet other single farmers even. So people like that would talk about milking cows and raising chickens in their profile … I am sorry, I just had to say that!

Obviously find a reputable site that doesn’t promote smut! Some internet dating sites seem to be more about helping people find a sex partner then finding true love. Choose wisely!

2) Be HONEST on your profile – and that starts with your picture. Don’t have a picture of you from 20 years ago and 30 pounds lighter. Have a recent picture of yourself … sure have your “best” picture, but don’t doctor it with Photoshop! Secondly, (guys) don’t try and make yourself out to be a rich romantic guru if you are broke and think being romantic means you put on a little English Leather before you take her to McDonalds for a fish Sandwich. That will only lead to problems later … because if that isn’t who you are NOW then it will not be who you are later! BE HONEST! And the same goes for the girls…hear me here, it’s okay to mention your “good qualities”, but don’t inflate yourself to be someone you are not.

3) Be original and creative in your bio - Stay away from saying what everyone else says on their profile … “fun, charming and happy”. Be more descriptive of what a “FUN” day looks like for you, or in what ways are you “charming” and what things make you “happy”.

4) Don’t Settle – When you are dating you can not become desperate because then you “settle” for someone who on a good day you wouldn’t even consider. Be patience!


5) Be yourself – on the first date is the best time to just be you. I am not saying fart and belch, but just be you. Because what you do not want is for the person to fall in love with who you are ACTING like you are, then later they meet the real you and it all crashes … then everyone is hurt!

When I met Jana I, as most do, put my best foot forward … I put on the charm, I was romantic, and I was very complimentary and loving! But here’s the deal… you'll need to keep that up forever and if you do ... wow, you have a marriage most will admire!

Why

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I just want to say THANK YOU for reading my blog! I mean seriously, there are so many blogs out there, I do really appreciate that you take the time to read it, and especially when you make comments! If I am honest, it makes me feel loved!

I’ve never shared WHY I blog … so here it is; I “blog” my thoughts because I think we live in a culture that is trying to make sense of loving Jesus without being weird and hiding out in a little “Christian” subculture. I think you really want to impact this world for good. It’s what Christ has called us to! “Go ye into all the world and make disciples of all nations…” I want to do that, and I believe you do too! But HOW?

I have neighbors, friends, and other Christian people I know who do really love Jesus, but frankly they are weird in the eyes of seekers. I do not mean that as a slam… I promise. It’s just that they are outside the culture completely and are not reaching the lost people who are right around them! And I think this breaks the heart of God honestly! It's like the Bullhorn street evangelist guy I interviewed down in Westport ... he thought what he was doing was great and effective. But we interviewed people who passed by this dude, and they told a different story. They explained that, “if that is what being a Christian is all about … they are not interested!” I don’t blame them!

Notice that scripture says “go INTO…” which is exactly what Jesus did… he left the perfection of Heaven (where they only play “Christian Praise Music”, have “Godtube”, rated “G movies” and only serve “Non-alcoholic Grape Juice” and “Chic Fa La” is the only Fast Food Restaurant), to come “INTO” a broken hurting sin filled world. Jesus did not HIDE from the broken, the hurting and He definitely did not hide from the sinner… actually that was who He spent most His time with (you understand that’s ME and YOU).

I think we Christians think we are “not in that group”, but we are all sinners … even when you find Christ and receive His free gift of salvation, you are still a sinner … hence the reason you and I still sin … we are just SAVED sinners is all.

That is WHY I blog; to communicate this message of hope for all people and to play my small part of Leading People to a Healthy Relationship with Jesus Christ.

Shalom!

Mercy Bowl VI

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What can I say; it feels good to win! 4 to 1 was the final score. Thanks team! Special Thanks to Amit Suri and & Ely Parker for running the show! Much appreciated! All the guys did outstanding! The Defense was great holding the other team to only one run, and the Offense for running some great plays and scoring!

Interesting side note; the team we played plays together all year round ... so for us to have only one practice the week before and win the thing ... is sweet! Lovin-it!

Have a great Thanksgiving!

Leadership Lesson

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I learned a valuable lesson in Leadership Sunday when about 20 guys, and one girl showed up for football practice for the Mercy Bowl VI game we play every year the Sunday before Thanksgiving.

Usually I run the game since I am the QB, well that hasn't always served us well because I never played organized football and really don't know the game all that well. I played Baseball, Tennis and Ping Pong growing up. My typical play call was - "just get open".

So this year I recognized that several guys and even the girl knew way more than me and I would be smart to have them run the show ... so that is what I did! I picked Amit Suri to run the Offense and Ely Parker to run the Defense ... and WOW, what a great practice we had!

I seriously think we are going to pound the church we are playing in the ground and make them cry like little sissy girls ... of course all in a Christian-nice-kind-of-way! Obviously!

Lesson I learned - as a leader, when you have a goal (to win the football game) and you have people who are way smarter and better then you willing to lead ... let them lead. Because then everyone is happier, including the "leader". Had I allowed my ego to stand in the way and not submitted to these guys knowledge and willingness to lead then we most likely we will lose the game this Sunday. So, now I am happy knowing that we are going to win (most likely), and if we don't ... I am not to blame! lol! Just kidding on that last part there... !