Desperate

In preparations for the NEW series, SIMPLE LIFE, I am finding myself becoming more and more desperate for a real move of God, not only in my heart and life, but also those who attend Mercy Church and those who live in our great city. I sense such an apathy, even in me, and I don't like it. I think back to a day when I was so hungry and excited about God, I mean I couldn't get enough of His touch in my life. I am hungry for that contagious passion for God again. And I am pursuing it 100%!

I can't speak for others, or begin to judge whether other people are "desperate" for God or not, that's between them and God, He knows and they know the truth,  but I do sense a "take it or leave it" attitude in the world today, and it's extremely dis-heartening to say the least, especially as a pastor. I understand being busy, but too busy for God is too busy, and I am guilty!

MY PRAYER: God forgive me for my apathy and for allowing my life to become too cluttered with other lessor-things and allowing little things to rob me of the joy of my salvation. God, help me to pursue you with a reckless abandon!

I feel that more than ever we need GOD actively involved in our LIFE, every part of it! And I am asking God to move in my heart and in your heart ... you ready for something great to happen in your life? I hope so, cause I am praying and fasting for it!

What's Missing?

Have you ever felt like something was missing? Maybe you have money, friends and some stuff, yet something just isn't there that should be there. I think we've all felt that at various times in our lives. Just days after getting back from my honeymoon I felt that something was missing; we bought a Pomeranian puppy ... missing piece found! I felt that about 3 years into my marriage, then we had a child ... missing piece found! We were living in Tulsa in the late 90's and felt there was something missing; we took a full time ministerial job in Alabama ... missing piece found!

I could go on with stories of feeling that something was missing, then later was found. But I am talking really about something much much deeper here then simply owning a puppy, something that is at the very core. So you have a sense that there is something missing from life; a sense of purpose, a sense of meaning, a sense of knowing why I am here on planet earth? Is that piece missing for you? If so, I believe I know how that missing piece can be found.

I believe this missing piece to be a authentic life-giving passionate relationship with Jesus Christ. I really do. I believe that that is what is missing from many people's lives, even Christians, today! Yep, many Christians are just going through the motions, just existing, doing the little Christian thing; going to church, giving a couple bucks in the offering, volunteering ever-so-often when manipulated into it, but the all consuming zeal and heartfelt love for God is not there to fuel the relationship.

Matthew 5:6 "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

Maybe you are feeling like something is missing? If so, I encourage you to thirst for God ... the Bible says that, "those who seek shall seek shall find ..." I know this to be true in my own life. I have had times I was not hungry and other times I have been hungry, I always got more when I was hungry and pursuing God wholeheartedly. Go for it with a reckless abandonment! You won't regret it. I can guarantee you this, when you do this you won't be so overwhelmed with or consumed with stupid petty immature things anymore and your happiness meter will be clicking on FULL!

Approval Addiction

I recently tweeted this thought on appreciation, “Appreciation, applause, encouragement, pats on the back and that a boys are a two way street; they not only need to be given but also received!Have you ever tried to compliment a person to only have it rejected and thrown back at you or thrown down? For example, “I like your hair!” And they reply with something like, “Oh you are only saying that to be nice, it looks stupid!” And when you get that kind of response it makes you not want to give any praise. It’s like when someone demands appreciation, then you really don’t want to give it.

I went through an emotionally intense program called FOCUS, really a boot camp for your emotions I would say. And in that program they talked about giving and receiving appreciation and they challenged us to ask ourselves what is in us that makes us feel unappreciated, (okay, yes maybe you are really are unappreciated and that is unfortunate, but what if not? Who’s responsible for me feeling good about myself, my job, my life … me or others?) And in the program they also asked us to check our hearts on WHY we were doing something, and WHO we were doing it for - our motive.

I have noticed over the years that some people really need (key word – need) a lot of appreciation, and often you will hear these people say, “I feel so unappreciated!” And many times with these people you can't give them enough “appreciation” to make them feel appreciated. It’s the whole skinny beautiful girl who thinks she’s fat and ugly and there is nothing you can say to her to make her feel skinny and beautiful. Then on the other hand there are people who don’t really need much appreciation shown to them because they do what they do for the love of doing it, or they do it for themselves or they do it for God and therein lies all the appreciation they need. I don't think it's wrong to WANT appreciation, I think we all do on some level, but to NEED it to feel appreciated or good about ourselves is really “Approval Addiction,” and it’s very unhealthy and will lead to an very unhappy life.

Psychologist and Counselor, Wayne McKamie says, “Timmy, there is such a thing as approval addiction. You are right on when discussing the bondage of needing everyone to accept, appreciate, or approve of us. The freedom that comes from letting go and self acceptance through knowing who God made us to be is awesome.”

Psychologist and Counselor, Pamela McKamie said, “Life is a journey and a learning experience. This self appreciation is within and it is something we all can work on. When we allow God to fill us up with his grace we can open up to change instead of being stuck. We can look to him to find this instead of others.”

Disclaimer: This blog entry is in no way trying to discredit the importance of giving people praise or showing appreciation, duh! Obviously this is something we ALL should do to and for those we love, and for those with whom we work. And honestly to see this blog in that light would tell me that you may struggle with “Approval Addiction”. And also this blog entry is not directed and any ONE person, but it is something that has been stirring in my heart ever since I attended FOCUS back in January of this year and felt it to be something many of us struggle with on some level.

Who's Right?

This is a HUGE question for not only Christians, but people of all faiths, and even people who claim "no faith," as their "faith." You know that it takes just as much faith to believe as it does not to believe? It does! But that is an entirely different blog entry.

So who is right? That is a great question, and it’s a question that shouldn’t scare you, or threaten you or even irritate you, and if it does, then in my opinion, you are not really sure of what you believe. Even when someone is trying to convince you that what you believe is wrong just secretly think their wrong, and it’s all good. Ha ha! I mean isn’t that what we all do, in our own minds? Now there have definitely been those times when I actually felt that I may be off a little and what the other person was sharing was a valid point that I should consider, or that should cause me to alter my current position.

When I say “who is right?” I am specifically thinking of all the different Bible teachers out there. I mean there are so many voices claiming to be RIGHT! You have entire ministries who feel that it is their “calling” to tell you everyone who is wrong, and of course they themselves are right. So what to do? Who to believe? Who to follow?

I mean you read Chuck Colson and he contradicts Rob Bell, then you read Bill Hybels and he contradicts Mark Driscoll, then you read Francis Chan and he sees things different then Joel Osteen, and Beth Moore says things that are contrary to Joyce Meyers … on and on I could go with the hundreds, even thousands of voices saying slightly different things in some cases, and pretty big things in other instances. So, who is right?

Personally I go with the Bible and the message of Jesus! The message of Jesus, out of all others, seems to me to be the best one, and I believe it to be God's word. We shouldn't worship a man, though we serve WITH man, and even follow great leaders, we don't worship mere men. I have read books by all the people mentioned above, and many others, and each have had great things to say that I can learn, grow and even be challenged by, but I do not see eye to eye with all of them on every topic. We ought to be able to be in fellowship with people who do not see everything just as we see it. At Mercy Church we have Baptists, Methodists, Catholics, Episcopalians, Presbyterians, Pentecostals, Lutherans, and dozens more, all loving and serving the cause of Christ together in community.

Here is the main thing; LOVE GOD and LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR!

Bad Day

We've all had one of those days, when you look at the clock hoping it's just about time to head home and it's only 11:23 AM ... and the thought of drudging through 5 1/2 more hours ... ugh! Pass me the bottle of Jack! Ha ha! Nothing is going right, all the calls you are making are to people who are not home, or not interested, or their having a bad day too. Not to mention you have a crick in your neck so when you turn to look at someone you turn your whole body, ha ha! It's that day you just want to crawl back in bed and make it go away.

Q: So how do you get through a day like that?

A: Take a DEEP breath to start with! That always helps. Play some uplifting music, I like classical (not everyone's thing I know) but something that jazzes you up. Then I recommend you go outside, if possible, and take a 5 minute walk to clear your head and talk to yourself about having a better day. Then when you get back to your desk, or whatever it is you do, do the thing you actually LOVE to do - whatever that "thing" is ... that call, that email, that letter, that meeting, that creative idea, that project, etc. Take 30 minutes and do what you love! If you are like, "Timmy I hate everything about my job." Then walk into your boss' office and quit! ha ha! Just kidding, but walking through that in your head may help you feel better ... go ahead and punch her/him in the throat (in your mind)!

A few more things; think about the things that are going right in your life, though it may only be a few things, that's a few things that are worth celebrating. Call a friend, spouse, lover, and tell them you love them and ask them to say a prayer for you and encourage you. Then finally take a few minutes to plan something exciting to do when you get off work; like watch a movie, enjoy a glass your favorite wine, smoke a fine cigar, sit outside and read a book, ride your bike, play a game with your kids AND IF YOUR MARRIAGE ... well make some beautiful sheet music tonight!

Doctrine of Love

I recently tweeted, "I just saw a bumper sticker, 'Adoption is LOVE, abortion is murder'. Well I think that abortion is Fear, Ignorance and FORGIVEN thru Jesus!" And that's when the Sh-- hit the fan from, what I would call the super-hyper religious conservatives.

I am not attempting to explain myself here so that those who feel I am, "all gracey gracey and love love" can sleep at night, though I am completely okay with that title verses being called, "all judgy judgy and hate hate," I'll gladly take the former! I feel I am in good company because that is exactly how the high and mighty religious people of Jesus' day felt about Jesus' message of love and acceptance. Somehow they felt threatened that God might just love people who weren't like them; which seems so contrary to what we as Christians should feel.

1 John 4:8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”

In the firestorm of comments, some 60 plus, someone said (I paraphrase) that they weren’t a big fan of the whole “doctrine of love” (now this was a Christian mind you – and claimed to have actually gone to theology school) I instantly was reminded of 1 John 4:8 (above), and thought since God IS LOVE then what this person was essentially saying was that they weren’t a fan of God? Really? Can you be a Christian and not be a fan of God?

1 Peter 4:8 “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”

After nearly 40 years of living for Christ, I know I don’t look like I am in my 40s, I am more and more coming to understand that for the most part it’s just not my job to judge people, point out their sins, condemn them to a lake of burning sulfur, especially on facebook, and definitely not unless I am asked to do so. I have enough to worry about just trying to work out my own salvation, and the salvation of my family. Now I realize that this is worthy of a huge discussion, and there are so many ways to go with this, but I do get very tired of the mean-spirited “Christians” who talk and act so self-righteous and above everyone else. And like many people said to me through facebook, “these kinds of Christians are what keep me away from church!” That sucks! I wouldn’t want to be that kind of Christian! I want to be like Jesus and be called, “a friend to the sinner!”

Just FYI, I used to be that other kind of Christian (the mean, judgmental, self-righteous type -- still am sometimes!) and you know what, I have found that I have lead more people to a relationship with Christ through LOVE then I ever did through the judgmental condemnation way!

Getting Along

Romans 12:18 
"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."

One of the most difficult things in life is getting along with each other. Husbands and wives struggle, brothers and sisters’ struggle, parents and children struggle, friends struggle, roommates struggle, co-workers struggle, neighbors struggle, even people in God-loving churches struggle to get along.
 
 
I was once in a heated church staff meeting when the pastor stood up and screamed, “Can’t we all just get along here?” We all sat there and thought, “yea that would be nice! We are working for Jesus here!” Ha ha!  
 
 
So what’s the problem? Imperfect, insecure, selfish, broken people are the problem. We are all “that” person, though some more than others for sure. Let’s just be honest here, we all want to do what we want when we want, with whom we want to do it with and no one can tell us different. Not even God. I have had many conversations with people about, “what God would want in a given situation” and people get angry when you essentially say, “you can’t or shouldn’t be doing that.” Of course when it all falls apart because we didn’t do it God’s way we scream, “why God, why me?” And if we are going to struggle in getting along in all our earthly relationships it only makes since we’ll struggle in getting along with God.
 
 
I wish I had the answers in getting along, but I agree with Paul in the scripture above, all you can do is get along as much as it depends on you. I have personally been the problem in relationships not working out, but I also have been the one doing everything in my power to get along with someone to know avail. They were too insecure, too broken, and too selfish to humble themselves and live at peace.
 
 
There are essentially three types of people in the world:
1)      Easy People – these people you'll never have problems with. They are emotionally mature. They do their job and do it well. If they have an issue they come straight to you, talk to you, clear the air and get right back at the task at hand. They never gossip, or whisper behind your back. We all love these types of people! Great to work with. And we all pray for more people like this.

2)      Difficult People – these people have problems, but usually after gossiping they will eventually come talk to you after creating damage in the organization. They are immature emotionally. Kind of like a baby, they require extra care from time to time. These people are not as much fun because they often are a distraction to the work at hand, though at times they can, after you sift through all the crap, be helpful. I believe that with coaching these people can become more like the "easy person" in your life.

3)      Impossible People – these people only see problems but fail to realize they are the problem, they can’t be happy. Nothing is good enough in their little immature minds. They see everything as a problem. They see everything from a negative perspective. They are beyond help. Anything that's not their idea is a bad idea. They poison relationships from the inside out. The best thing is to get them out of your life.

Help Me, I Have Kids!

Starting Sunday, September 11th Jana and I will be kicking off an all new series entitled, Help Me, I Have Kids! 

Nobody told us parenting would be like this! We imagine ourselves in picture-perfect families, and then reality sets in. From toddler to teenager and beyond, parenting is frightening, exhilarating, gut-wrenching, life-changing, sorrowful, and joyful all at once. Join us for a light-hearted series of messages that takes a serious look at the reality of parenting. We'll learn what the Bible teaches us about parenting. Grow in your faith as you grow closer to God's perfect picture of parenthood in the all new series - Help Me, I've Got Kids!

Series Begins September 11th @ Mercy Church, I hope to see you there!

Loving the Unlovable

I am ashamed to admit it but, I haven't always been the guy who loved all people, especially what I would have called the lower-class (extremely poor) people of our society.  Thank God I am not that guy anymore!

I grew up in what would have been considered, at least here in America, middle class, though really compared to the rest of the world I was rich for I had a roof over my head, three hot meals a day - and more if I wanted it, clean drinking water, transportation, a comfy bed, running water, clean clothes and even toys I didn't need. I had that and to top it all off I had a family who loved me.

It's easy to grow up with all that and forget that there are people just like you who didn't grow up like you did, having all you needed. I didn't chose to be born in the family I was born into, I could have just as easily been born in a third world country with nothing. I could've been born to a family who didn't love me ... things could've been so different. I had no right to be prideful, arrogant or snobby to others less fortunate than me. I had no right turning my nose up to those who haven't had the opportunities I've had.

Spending time with the homeless has made me realize that life is fragile and that which I have can be gone in a flash ... if not for the grace of God there go I! Also spending time with a friend of mine in his 8th year of a 10 year prison sentence has impacted me; once making a six figure income, owning a big house in an affluent community, driving a nice expensive car -- now behind bars -- all has been taken from him. Most people have abandoned him, but God hasn't!

I guess I was just thinking today that each of us could be that guy in the picture with me -- homeless, broken, addicted! And let's not be stuck-up, snobby-types and love all people! FYI, the first step in loving people is helping them if they need it, and acknowledging them -- saying "hi" rather then ignoring them!

1 John 3:18 “Little children, let us stop just saying we love people; let us really love them, and show it by our actions.”

Stub Your Toe

I have shared in recent blog posts that 2010 was a tough year for me, not only as a pastor but as a husband, father, friend and Christian. I didn't fall off the bandwagon into some crazy sin or anything (for those of you who were curious,) just lots of struggles in my mind over my calling, and God's purpose for my life. I was asking God and myself things like -- could I do what I felt God calling me to do, why is life so hard sometimes, did God really care anymore, should I be doing something else? I guess you could call it a crisis of faith on some level.

And just today as I was talking with a good friend of mine who pastor's a church in Atlanta, GA. it occurred to me what had happened and the best way for me to describe it is in a illustration. And by the way, I think this happens to all of us at various times in our life.

MY STUBBED TOE

Have you ever been strolling along, head held high and wham! you stub your toe, or trip over something? What do you do when that happens? Typically, we look down to see what we tripped on, or what stubbed our toe. Of course all this after we get up off the floor and stop crying, right! Ha ha! I believe what we do after that is paramount! Unfortunately, those types of events make us fearful of doing it again, so we become much more careful and concerned about what's down at our feet. Then rather then looking up to where we are going, we look down where our feet are ... we lose focus, we lose vision, and we lose our edge.

For me, life just wasn't as beautiful or fun as it had been in years past. I wasn't taking as many chances to do great things. I started seeing the impossibilities rather than the possibilities. I started seeing why we couldn't do a thing, rather then believing we could do anything through the power of Christ.

What about you? Have you stubbed your toe? Are you looking down rather then up? Today you can decide to LOOK UP and see the beauty of God's creation in nature and in people! You can begin to see all the things that are possible ... and do them!